This was really well done, correct formatting and appropriate tone and language were used. This is an important topic and is interesting as it addresses a large portion of the population. The interview was linked and tied in to the survey very well, going off of the survey’s general trend to the interviewee’s response, which did follow the trend as well. In the abstract, it may be helpful to directly address what question(s) was/were answered through the survey and/or interview. After this question, provide a possible hypothesis or two so you will be able to accept or reject said hypothesis in the results section along with the figures and data included.. Improvements to be made could be cleaning up sentences by reducing the word count. This can be done by rearranging the sentence and substituting words for each other. Though this was not a prevalent issue, it could be those in-between points. Repetitiveness could be possibly avoided pertaining to the bar graph figures included by not stating the question asked in the survey. Though this is a necessary statement, since the question has already been written out in the paper it could be better to refer or mention back to it instead.
This was really well done, correct formatting and appropriate tone and language were used. This is an important topic and is interesting as it addresses a large portion of the population. The interview was linked and tied in to the survey very well, going off of the survey’s general trend to the interviewee’s response, which did follow the trend as well.
ReplyDeleteIn the abstract, it may be helpful to directly address what question(s) was/were answered through the survey and/or interview. After this question, provide a possible hypothesis or two so you will be able to accept or reject said hypothesis in the results section along with the figures and data included..
Improvements to be made could be cleaning up sentences by reducing the word count. This can be done by rearranging the sentence and substituting words for each other. Though this was not a prevalent issue, it could be those in-between points.
Repetitiveness could be possibly avoided pertaining to the bar graph figures included by not stating the question asked in the survey. Though this is a necessary statement, since the question has already been written out in the paper it could be better to refer or mention back to it instead.